hmmm

well, i said i'd take a sabbatical. i think maybe i'll blog more part-time. :)

i'm feeling pretty okay about the mysteries of life right now. you could say life is just about our choices. i guess right now i'm feeling okay about my choices. in yoga, we say listen to your body. i've been doing that. i've been listening to myself. i've fought myself a lot in the past before and didn't end up very happy sometimes.

but it seems listening to myself may also lead me to being single. i feel that it's okay, though. i wanted to have a kid so i stayed in a relationship even when i didn't feel like it was very good for me sometimes. i just kept going to counseling or going to yoga, and i achieved a measure of peace and maybe some serenity.

some people think that happiness is elusive or illusion. i don't really think so.

i stayed the night at my apartment last night and was comfortable there. i'm back to the house to use the internet, see my dog, kind of put loose ends together.

sometimes i think it's just true that we have the energy for what we want to do.

no one wants to be a selfish person. but well, i don't know. i don't have the answers. i just know that i'm feeling more at peace right now. i had a good night last night. i've had some great times lately. and tough ones, too.

as for marriage, i don't claim to be an expert. i've tried to be one. i guess an expert cook gets to stay an expert cook. the ingredients are always the same, and when they try to grow, well, there's always a new recipe. you could say the same for marriage, but i think compatibility is a really interesting and complicated thing. so much so that maybe being single just works better. again, i don't know. but i want to study psychology some more. and i know i can really concentrate in my apartment.