people's biggest fear is falling, even though they spend the whole first year of life doing it.

thanks for the message u church

"tyranny is always
better organized
than freedom"

celibate since saturday

what do you think it means
when you've replaced your password
from your hometown
to sugarcoat?
(don't worry, i'll change it again)...

i chose to take the journey
i read so many student papers
and sometimes it feels like an avalanche
but you know what
if you get out from under the avalanche
you'll see
sometime the light will reappear from within
and you'll remember you have a soul

and those souls who have been weighing you down
you'll remember they have a story
and they're the hero
and better yet, you're the hero
of yours

so many of my students love their fathers
and i remember how i love mine
one father of a student drives 20 hours a day
in a semi
and she hardly ever sees him

and i don't know if i'll provide some child
with a father
maybe all the men on the planet are too busy
being other things
but i also don't know if i'll be a mother
maybe i'm too busy doing other things
and
i won't let that make me sick today
i will find a place to put each and every paper
as each story makes my heart wholer and bigger
even though sometimes
that feels like quite a stretch

but today i learned in yoga that the main thing
i need to stretch
are my hands
this typing
this white-collar lifestyle
some people may say i don't work with my hands
but what the fuck do i work with then?
my heart?

we all do

and i love my heart
and i love how i've really used it
and it doesn't even matter if the people
i loved
loved me back
or not
because i'm just in this moment
and i'm going to make mashed potatoes and gravy
and keep living
because my grandma didn't go through all she went through
and either did carolee
who was so alive
she still feels alive to me
5 1/2 years after she's dead

go ahead
and give yourself a shot
at being some kind of hero, too
for yourself
for a change

better yet
may all beings be happy
may all beings be free