lots of thinking tonight

there are tribes in the world that don't have a lot of problems. some tribes in south america were found not even to have words for anger.

i guess we can blame it on corn and barley and cows. they provided us food too easily, we mass produced humans, stored food, and started to fight over the profits.

as we have increasingly stored money and decorated houses, we have spent more and more time away from each other.

people cleave to religion for meaning because they are separated from other people and look 2,000 years back to a guy who was really nice to everyone for inspiration. they listen quietly while their preacher talks about that guy and try to have a personal relationship with that guy.

then they try to love their families but wonder why everyone feels sad and disconnected. so they buy bigger screens, more monitors, more videogames, so everyone can be connected to a story in every room. they grow grass and mow it so they can own their own little patch of green.

i'm just wondering who lived better: the native americans, without their books, with their oral legends that kept them connected to each other making things for each other. or the civilized ones who took over bringing guns, germs, and steel?

we fight over so much now because there are too many paths. we get tired of looking for overlap and get lazy paying attention to popular brands.

i want a tent and a community. ever hang out with people you know well and get that *comfortable* feeling after awhile? you can fall asleep easily, feel your body relax? what are we doing? trying to recreate that with families of our own, friends or offspring. but i still feel like these are chirades. there is real connection to be had. i want to tear down the fences, but they keep my dog in.