bliss

even with a bladder infection, i've got a sense of bliss. i hardly noticed even going to the clinic. i was kind of floating. things are really, really good. the peace of life and love. the peace of new promise. i feel silly even writing when i feel this good. like, well, it's time to go to law school... i don't need my creativity to save me... life is good... i don't need to get interested in random people... i've got what i need... i am really excited about my new apartment. enjoying cleaning it, imagining my vision for it. am grateful that kyle and clint are helping me move tomorrow. am grateful to maybe have a roommate... a home... food tastes much better to me today. at open harvest i sampled everything for sampling: heirloom tomatoes and cherry tomatoes with sesame goddess dressing (i bought them); camberbert cheese (i bought some); good bread; and a smattering of other good things... yum. i feel ready to read again... have some good books to read this semester, lots of interesting stuff to learn... i know i'm feeling settled when i can read, and i haven't felt that way in about 3 months... so it's good that i'll be able to read as the weather gets cooler, and i'm getting graded... wonder if a friend of mine will tell me what's up with renaissance art.... i love being a listener right now... i'm no kind of a writer when i feel kind of giddy/happy... thankfully joy castro's energy really inspires me to write as do the other people in that class... when i taught at scc using the natalie goldberg freewriting method, it worked well... i wrote some decent stuff, enjoyed hearing my students stuff... but in the grad writing workshop, it's writing energy on speed. so i'm glad i'll have that to look forward to on tuesdays... on mondays, i think i can handle the sort of staidness of the professor... she can't help having spent the last 7 years in a library in new york... :) she's interesting... she knows about how cultures/attitudes developed based on the conquests/explorations from 1492 on... i feel like i'm really learning about the world. my travels, though i had them, were also limited... i heard bits and pieces about history while i was there... but i really knew nothing going into traveling... now, i have some of the places in mind in terms of my memory... but it will be really cool to finally learn the history... i don't think i've ever been settled enough to want to learn history, but i do now. will be good to be relaxed enough to actually be able to do this reading. also really looking forward to having a bed that is not part of a furnished apartment. furnished apartments do in a pinch, but will be so good to have my own clean things. i don't think i've ever enjoyed cleaning this much. am i becoming a regular domestic? i even want to learn how to cook... like recipes look like interesting challenges :) i watched giada (de laurenta?) on the food channel while waiting at the bank. it was fun because it was me and three spanish speakers--two of them were a couple i worked with with in the prime time program a year ago, and we were really bonding over thinking that food looked good, trying to predict the names of the ingredients with the sound off. i thought it was an excellent language-learning opportunity. we look for authentic experiences in language-learning. while we watched her cook, the husband was like: what are those things called again, and i said i think they're artichokes. then he said they're really good with cream, that they used to do that at a restaurant where he worked, and i said, yeah, over chicken. and then we were trying to guess what kinds of cheese were being added to this pasta dish which looked so good with wilted spinach and cherry tomatoes, and then she put over it this sort of bread-crumb topping... anyways, my memory for recipes is still no good, but we'll see... i also like very simple eating... which is what i tend to do on my own. mostly i try not to just eat chips :) i try to hit more food groups generally. fruit is starting to taste really good to me again, which is a good sign. maybe even better than ever. wow, the cantaloupe today. my dad always loved cantaloupe. my dad has such a reservoir of happiness. he was glad when i called him tonight with signs indicating that i'm settling in lincoln.